There’s a useful little exercise that can help us observe people in a better light.
It’s an excellent way for leaders & managers to help others apply their traits as strengths, rather than perceiving them as weaknesses.
To my fellow UX Researchers and Designers — this is a helpful guideline to balance out user frustrations/motivations. It’s been beneficial to me while building more positive experiences for customers — by bringing out their personas’ best intentions.
Allow me to elaborate by trying to reverse some of the labels we create in our minds. (We all know our social titles are so biased anyway.)
Please don’t get me wrong — I’m all for calling a spade a spade. But I believe that everyone can choose to use the character traits they were born with for better or worse. I also think that if the leaders in our lives would understand this concept better, we’d break a lot of broken aspects of society.
I received this as an anonymous printout that a friend handed me about 10 years ago, so I don’t know who to credit for it. If anyone reading this does know where it came from, please let me know so I can credit them here!
What if, instead of seeing someone as “Anxious,” we saw them as “Alert, Caring, Involved”?
Instead of “Arrogant,” — “Self-Confident,”?
Instead of “Clingy” or “Dependent,” — “Affectionate and Caring.”
Instead of “Cowardly and Indecisive,” —“Cautious or Protective”?
Instead of “Crazy and Unstable,” —“Highly Sensitive”?
Instead of “Critical” — “Upholds High Standards.”
Instead of “Cruel”, — “Self Protective, Honest”
Instead of “Cynical”, — “Witty, Independent Thinker”
Instead of “Guilt-Ridden”, — “Conscientious”
Instead of “Independent, Reckless”, — “Spontaneous, brave, Enthusiastic, Adventurer.”
Instead of “Nervous” — “Introspective, Self-Aware.”
Instead of “Lazy” — “Relaxed, Composed, Satisfied with their Lot”
Instead of “Obsessive-Compulsive” — “Industrious, Meticulous, and Thorough.”
Instead of “Permissive,” — “Talented, Forgiving.”
Instead of “Rebellious & Defiant,” — “Individualistic & Courageous.”
Instead of “Selfish” — “Self-Nurturing.”
Instead of “Shallow” — “Cheerful, Faithful, Optimistic.”
Instead of “Stingy” — “Thrifty, Frugal.”
Instead of “Stubborn & Fanatical” — “Resolute, Devoted, Unwavering.”
Instead of “Tactless, Cynical” — “Honest, Gutsy.”
Instead of “Wasteful,” — “Generous, Charitable.”
Instead of “Wimpy, Oblivious, Indifferent,” — “Optimistic, Full of Faith.”
Again, please regard this as very light “food for thought.” NEVER excuse abusive behavior from others by justifying the good in a person. When in doubt, consult a professional. [Insert any other warning labels you’d like here.]
Also, don’t get me wrong — I love people in general, but none of us are saints or all knowing and we all tick each other off sometimes. Mabe most times. But we’re stuck with each other, so with a mixture of a little more pragmatism and a lot more heart, maybe we can understand and get along just a little bit better.
The more we can recognize the good in others, the more they’ll be able to see it in themselves. ❤️
